i will be turning 23 in less than a month from now... huh... another birthday...meh... in my family.. birthday is not much of a celebration anyway.. my mom never bothered and my dad doesn't even remembered... not even once...and to be honest.. i've grown tired of expecting anything for my birthday.. because all i got was dissapointment all the way around... and this year... i'm not really looking forward to it... i don't feel like celebrating... i don't feel excited... i don't feel happy... i don't like birthdays... my own especially...
my age and longevity is surely something to be grateful for... but my accomplishment is not... i felt stuck... matter of fact, i still am stuck... each and every year... on the day of my birth... i sat alone... thinking... ok... what have i accomplished this year... and yet... so far... dissapointment... one after another...
i spend the day hating and blaming everyone... myself included... hating them for not caring... blaming them for making me pay for their stupid mistakes... frustrated with myself for unable to make them listen... make them care... make them clean up after their mess... felt like i was being punished for something i didn't do..
but... if i could wish for one thing for my birthday... i would wish for just one chance.. one chance to make our life better... make my life better... to move on... get on with life... and never look back... never look back on those failures... sadness.. and dissapointment.... just one chance to make things work... one chance to change everything... just one chance...it's all i want...
love...
sharifahatiqanotsoawesome
(T_T)"
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